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Danny and Me

31091_1348759650805_5378452_nAlright folks, I've been letting Danny do all the talking up to this point, but now it's my turn. I'm Andrew Joyce and I can talk for myself.

Yeah, I admit that Danny is a better writer than I am, but so what, he's only a dog and I am his Lord and Master.

"HEY ... HEY ...HEY ... It's me ... Danny! No one is my Lord and Master."

"Please Danny ... I know this is your blog ... but you have been talkin' about me and I think it's time I set the record straight."

"The record is straight asshole, you're a friggin' drunk and I do all the writing for you and you take all the credit. Now ... this is my blog so get lost."

"Danny, please let me say something to the fine people who read your blog, all two of 'em'"

"Was that a crack?'

"Whatever."

"Whatever yourself! Okay ... just this once you may have the floor, so to speak. And you better say what you have to say now because it's your only shot."

"Thank you Danny".

It's me, Andrew ... I like Danny, but sometimes he can be a bit much. So, where was I? Oh yeah, I wanted to tell you that I'm not such a fuck up as Danny portrays in his blog. Well, maybe I am, but that is beside the point. Now that I have your attention, I'm a little tongue-tied, but I'll say what I have to say.

I want to tell you of someone. I am, as Danny is always saying, a loser. But I hang on because there is one woman who believes in me. She believes in angles and she believes in me. She believes in losers and she believes in me.

She believes in me.

Her name is Suzanne and she is a beauty. She motivates me to get up in the morning ... she sustains me throughout the day, and she puts me into my bed at night with a smile upon my face. She is everything good ... she is everything.

That's all I wanted to say. Danny is breathing down my neck to get off, so I'll give him back his blog.

Posted on Blog

Danny's Road Trip

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Hey guys ... it's me Danny your favourite dog. I'm hangin' out just listenin' to Willie sing a little Kris. My human, Andrew, doesn't get it, he doesn't know that Kris and Willie are speaking for God. Have you ever listened to "Sunday Morning Comin' Down?"

Andrew is off the boat ... gettin' in trouble no doubt. Me, I'm listenin' to Willie.

I love to ride in cars, don't you? Sticking my head out the window, barking at any dogs I see along the way ... I can even put up with Andrew when I'm riding in a car.

So this is what I wanted to tell ya. Two days ago Andrew took me out to his car and opened the door and told me to get inside. Normally I wouldn't do what he wanted. But a ride in the car ... so I jumped in. I didn't know where we were going, but as long as I could stick my head out the window I didn't care.

It was a Sunday morning, the roads were empty, and it was a good thing because Andrew was a little worse for the wear. He had had a rough Saturday night and he was still a little tipsy. And just like in the song, he stopped by a church and we listened to the choir.  It was then that I knew what Kris meant when he wrote, "There's something in a Sunday that makes a body feel alone." Because I saw it in Andrew's eyes that Sunday morning. It was indeed a Sunday morning coming down.

He turned to me and said, "I need a beer."

I thought, "You need more than a beer pal, you need help."

We were still by the church and a lonely bell was ringing ... and Andrew was wishing he was stoned. just like in the song. Friggin' humans!

I knew that the only thing Andrew cared more about than getting high was me. So before he could start the car and go looking for booze on that Sunday morning, I jumped out the window and took off, knowing that he would chase after me. As long as he was focused on me he'd not dwell on ... his Sunday Morning coming down.

I'm sorry to say he caught up with me right away and then we went and bought a six-pack.

It was indeed a Sunday Morning coming down, and it came smack down, right on the head of my human.